It’s been a long time since I posted in this blog and as you can see, sometimes I talk about things that are off topic from Degrassi. I just thought, I know, I’ll talk about all the shit that I hate about Halloween. More to the point, the bullshit that tries to ruin Halloween for everyone. Anyone who knows me knows that I’m a huge Halloween fanatic. I love to watch horror movies all month long, have a party and then scare the kiddies on Halloween night. So I present to you, the five annoying things that try to ruin Halloween year after year.
5. Lousy Treats
I think we all know what I’m talking about. Cheap ass hard candy that no one likes. Kids and adults want Snickers, Reese’s, Kit Kat’s, all that good shit. Not that horrible candy that’s in strawberry wrappers that everyone hates. Or shitty lolly pops in clear packages. Raisins are also to be considered a sin against the Halloween gods. Not to mention tooth brushes and paste. What kid wants that? I guarantee it goes straight into the trash, unless the kid is so damn poor that they’ll gladly take it. When I was a kid sometimes people would give pennies or nickles. Yeah, thanks a lot you cheapskate! Apples suck too, as does fruit in general during Halloween. This old bag once gave them out one year and we threw them against her house because she just had to be a shithead and point out how big I was to still be Trick or Treating. I was all, “It’s not my fault I’m tall for my age you old crow.” One thoughtless guy though had no idea that it was Halloween so to atone for his grievous slight, he gave me and my little brother a whole unopened package of Oreo cookies. Thanks dude!
4. Annoying Teenagers
Yes, I sound like an old man saying that teenagers are annoying, but that’s only because teenagers are really fucking annoying. They either never come dressed or they come in huge packs acting like a bunch of asses or punks. This one year this poor kid got egged by some assholes driving around in a car. I had to hose the kid off, so I gave him some extra candy to make up for the fact that yes, fuck heads like this do exist just to be pricks to random people. Another thing I hate is when they don’t say Trick or Treat. I’ve noticed that it’s mostly guys that act like this too. It’s not to say that I don’t give out candy to everyone who comes, because I do. But goddamn, put a little effort into it. Plus they also do shit like this.
3. Bringing Religion Into Halloween
I’ll just say right off the bat that I do believe in God and I’m a Christian. But I always find it annoying as hell when people want to bring religion into it because they think that Halloween is evil. I say it’s only evil if you make it evil. Sure it started off as a Druid festival for the lord of the dead Samhain, but that meaning has gone away long ago. Dressing up as a monster or a slutty witch isn’t going to damn you to hell. Halloween is still around because the kids love it. I remember one year a Facebook friend said that her kids were having fun Trick or Treating, only it was the 30th. I said, “Uh, it’s not Halloween so why are all you guys doing it a day early?” She says, “It falls on a Sunday and we’re in the bible belt.” I didn’t say anything to that, but I was thinking, that’s hilarious especially since you motherfuckers are the most hypocritical, intolerant people on the planet. Speaking of the bible belt some wacko minister is trying to make Jesusween into a thing. Yes, that’s right, Jesusween. He thought that Jesus not being a part of Halloween was highly blasphemous. But that’s because Jesus isn’t a part of Halloween and you know what? That’s ok.
2. Banning Halloween In Schools
I remember when I was a young lad we would all go in our respective costumes, have a Halloween parade around the school and then have a Halloween party at the end of the day. It was always a lot of fun, but now a days you can forget about that shit. Religious fanatics and just plain party poopers have ruined Halloween at school for everyone because it’s offensive. At least according to them. When I was a kid my best friend was a Jehovah’s Witness and so when we would have our Halloween party he would simply go home with not a fuss at all. Not today, my niece is growing up not having some Halloween fun at school because of maybe one or two people whose kids go to the school decided for everyone that Halloween should be banned. They probably think that the huge sugar rushes kids were having was Satanic. Also a lot of reasoning is that they say that it’s offensive to other cultures or belief’s. But here’s the thing, I think it’s offensive that a lot of people aren’t allowed to celebrate something period. If you don’t want to partake in something, then don’t. Just take your child home and don’t make a big deal over it. And if you feel that they’re feeling left out, well, that’s your problem. I bet you anything that a lot of these parents when they were kids Trick or Treated and had fun. Too bad they’re denying their kids the same.
1. Trunk Or Treating
This is by far the lamest thing that has been invented. Much like what Christians are doing to rock, these lameos are making Halloween less fun. Sure it helps for people who live in rural communities. But a lot of the times it’s because people are too paranoid about so called tainted candy or they’re too lazy to take their children around Trick or Treating. Or the other thing, they want to preach to kids who only want candy. These poor kids will never know what it was like to go around from house to house, passing fellow little ghouls to get their treats. It’s just part of the fun of the holiday. But no, they get to be in a church or school parking lot going from trunk to trunk. How boring is that? Even today one of my cousins was saying that it seems that the town that they moved to doesn’t celebrate Halloween. They prefer to Trunk or Treat on a fucking Saturday. Way to take the spirit of the holiday away.