The Wheels: Age of Asshole story line comes to a head in this one. Wheels totally deserves everything that happens to him.
Pre-credit opener: We see Wheels in Joey’s kitchen being a big fucking moocher. Joey says that he’s going to go outside so he can make sure that his car actually starts up. As soon as he leaves Wheels tells Joey’s milf of a mom bye and then he goes through her purse and takes her loose change. What a fucking prick this guy is.
In the Degrassi High hallways Wheels actually has the nerve to ask Joey if he wants to go play video games with the money that he stole from Joey’s mom. Joey says that he can’t though because he has to study for an exam. Wheels just says, “Boring.” Joey then notices that Wheels has his watch on. Wheels tells him that he’s just borrowing it since his is broken. I love how he just took it and didn’t even bother to ask. Joey of course says all pissed off, “Then get it fixed.” Holy shit! Snake comes along and he totally has a Prince Valiant haircut going on. Wheels then asks Snake if he wants to go play some Street Fighter II but Snake says that he also has to study. Wheels says, “You guys amaze me, I’ll see you at home.” As soon as he leaves Joey says, “Home. He takes my things without asking me, he snores. He’s driving me crazy.” Snake points out the obvious and tells Joey to tell Wheels to leave. But Joey says he can’t since he’s his friend. What a fool.
In the Library Alexa and Michelle are studying for God knows what. (I just gotta say, Michelle sure has gotten better looking as the show has progressed.) The librarian tells them that the library is closing at four and Michelle goes on this long rant about it not staying open later. Michelle admits to Alexa that the house she’s living in is the worst. Basically the people like to party a lot and she can’t study at all. So I guess the people that live there have no jobs and just stay up all night watching infomercials, except loudly.
At the Jeremiah household Joey’s hot mom seems to be going through her books and she looks very distressed. Just then Joey walks in and she tells him that she needs to talk to him. She asks him how much longer Wheels is going to be staying with them. Turns out he’s an even bigger moocher than I thought. He’s draining everything there. Financially and emotionally. She then mentions that she talked to his grandma and it turns out that the old nag wants to talk to him. After Joey defends Wheels for a bit she drops the bomb on him that money has been disappearing from her purse. Stupid Joey get’s all pissed off and says, “Wheels doesn’t steal.” She puts two and two together and says that her money hasn’t started disappearing until Wheels came into their lives. Joey says that he’ll talk to him but after his big exam or essay. But she says that no matter what, she wants Wheel’s David Koresh looking ass out of their house.
The next day at school Joey and Wheels come driving in and Joey seems to be listening to this really lame song. I’m like come on! This almost has to be around the time that Grunge started coming out back in the early 90’s. But I guess things come in later in Canada. Anyways, Joey tells Wheels to hold on for a bit and he ask him point blank if he stole the money from his mom’s purse. Wheels of course is a big fucking liar and flat out denies it. He mentions how he loves living at his house and that it’s the first time he’s been happy since his parents were killed. So not only is he a fucking liar, he’s manipulative too by bringing up his dead parents. Joey tries to say that if he was borrowing it, but Wheels cuts him off and says, “Maybe she spent it and forgot.” Joey looks at him as he walks off and you can tell he doesn’t believe him for one second.
Back in the library we see Simon studying with Alexa and Michelle and I’m already bored to tears with Michelle’s B plot. But surprisingly Simon answered this really complicated law question correctly. I guess he’s not as brain dead as I thought he was. Michelle continues to bitch about her home life. Simon comes up with going to study at her dad’s house. Michelle tells Simon that he’s brilliant and both he and Alexa can’t believe she said that. Michelle mentions that her dad goes to a cooking class so that way she can break in and study and then leave before he get’s home.
It’s after school and Joey is totally going off about Wheels to Snake. Joey mentions how he always has money to go play video games. Wheels is all waiting on top of Joey’s hood, as they get in the car Joey asks him how he has money to play video games all the time. Wheels lies some more and says he has some money saved. Then he adds, “You still think I took the money don’t you?” Wheels has the fucking audacity to get pissed off and tells Joey, “Thanks a lot! Jerk!” Upon hearing this Joey loses his shit and says, “Jerk? You’re calling me a jerk?!” Then he asks him how much longer he’s going to stay at his house. Wheels replies with, “Until I find a place.” Joey mentions how he’s not even bothering to look. Wheels then says, “I don’t have any money.” As they drive away Joey tells him that maybe he could go find a job and live on his own. Wheels says, “Joey, I’ve got enough problems already!”
Back at the Jeremiah compound Joey and Wheels are still arguing. Wheels brings out the fact that his parents were killed and he doesn’t have it easy like Joey does. Joey get’s so annoyed he actually calls out Wheels on his bullshit and says, “Why do you always bring that up, that was over two years ago.” Wheels says all irritated that one doesn’t get over something like that. But whoa, whoa, stop the clock! Hasn’t this dick head been saying since the 3rd season of Degrassi Junior High that he’s over his nerdy parents getting annihilated by a drunk driver? Anyways, Wheels gets a fucking soda and takes the last of the Dipps. Joey points out that he took the last one and Wheels tells Joey, “So, first come first served. Anyways, I don’t need to hear a lecture from a jerk like you!” Joey can’t stands no more! He tells Wheels that he needs to get his ass out of his house. Joey mentions that his parents want him out. Wheels then busts out the victim card and says, “I’m out of here.” Joey makes him give him the watch back and the fucking prick says, “Some friend you are!”
Outside of Snake’s house we hear them telling something to him and Snake is all, “I’ll tell him!” Wheels is waiting on the back porch which looks like the same porch where he made out and fingered Heather last season. Wheel’s asks him, “Well?” Snake tells him fuck no. Wheel’s then asks him if he told him that it’s only for one night. But Snake tells him how Wheels never wanted to leave Joey’s place. Wheels then acts like an asshole and shouts out, “Your parents are jerks!” Snake very lamely just says, “They are not!” You know, instead of fucking him up right then and there for talking shit about his parents. Snake then mentions how Wheels has a reputation. Snake for some insane reason apologizes to him as Wheels is walking away talking shit about having lousy friends.
At Michelle’s dad’s place she walks in all happy at having a quiet place to study but her dad is there. Turns out he was taking a shower and blah, blah. He offers her a place to study so she goes to her room. Who gives a mother fuck about this?
In the mean streets of Toronto, it’s started to rain and Wheels is really boned now. He’s freezing his ass off and looks at a homeless person hiding from the rain with disgust. What a dick.
At Michelle’s dad’s she’s studying and they’re talking about whatever. But I can’t concentrate because her boobs are so huge! Haha. I know I’m awful, but goddamn it, they’re out there. Anyways, they start to argue and all this good shit and her dad apologizes and says that he doesn’t want to fight with her.
We go back to Wheels inside of a phone booth calling someone and it’s his grandma. I love how she says, “What do you want Derek?” He mentions how he needs a place to stay since Joey’s parents threw him out. She says all matter of factly, “I know, you were stealing.” Of course he denies it, but she knows how his crooked ass his already. She says all annoyingly, “You lie and you lie.” Wheels begs her and she tells him that if she does he has to go by her rules and wants him to go to counseling. Wheels says that he doesn’t need it and she get’s pissed and says, “Yes you do!” Wheels basically tells her what she wants to hear and says that he’ll do whatever she wants. But she doesn’t believe him at all. She tells him to go to a shelter. After he puts down the people there she hangs up on his ass. After that he calls up Mark making some small talk trying to invite himself over eventually. What an asshole.
Michelle and her boobs come bouncing down the stairs and her dad offers for her to study there whenever she wants to. She tells her dad that she would like to move back in, but wants to pay rent. She wants to make a contract with him because basically she doesn’t want to listen to him. Especially a curfew. They make all these bullshit conditions and they agree that she’s going to live with him again.
At Snakes house Wheels calls him up because he has nowhere to go. I love how no one wants to take his ass in. Snake acts like a telemarketer is talking to him because his parents are in the living room with him. Wheels tells him that he needs a place to stay because it’s pouring. Stupid Snake tells him to meet him out back in a few minutes. But he mentions to Wheels not to knock or make a big racket.
Ok, this is the scene where it all comes to a head for Wheels. Snake makes a really lame excuse and leaves. He goes out back and Wheels comes running by soaking wet. Snake tells him to not be all loud and tells him that his parents heard about the money he stole and they don’t want him talking to him anymore. But for the 20th time Wheels lies his ass off and says, “I didn’t take anything. Why does everybody think I did?” Wheels begs Snake to let him stay there and mentions how his grandma won’t even take him in. After Snake tells him that he can’t he finally admits that he’s desperate and has no where else to go. Snake being stupid tells Wheels that he can stay on the porch. Wheels can’t believe his ears and says, “Outside?!” Wheels all pissed off says thanks and Snake says that it’s the best he can do for him. I swear this motherfucker is incorrigible. He starts to blame Joey for all of his woes, even saying, “I thought he was a friend, the guy is a total loser.” Hearing this Snake finally get’s some balls and actually get’s pissed at Wheels. He points out how Joey let him stay at his place for weeks and tells Wheels that he’s so self centered. Wheels of course brings up his parents tragic death and says that Snake has it easy. Snake says, “So!” And continues to say that he can’t hide behind that bullshit for the rest of his life and needs to start taking some responsibility. Wheels says that it’s not his fault they were killed. But Snake mentions how him being out on the streets is his fault and everyone tried to help him, but all Wheels does is take advantage of people. I guess his grandma was right about Wheels taking and taking from people. If this was Good Times we would have heard someone in the audience say, “Right on!” Snake goes back inside all pissed off and tells Wheels to be gone by the morning. Wheels then just sits there taking the typical Steve Urkel route and feels sorry for himself after being called out on his shitty behavior.
The next day at school Wheels looks like complete shit because it’s obvious he didn’t sleep at all. He talks to Joey and mentions how he called his grandma and he’s going to talk to her later on in the day. Wheels then apologizes for being a fucking prick and says that things will be different from now on. Then he admits to Joey that he ripped off his hot ass mom. But promises to some how pay her back every single cent he stole. Joey all pissed off says, “I’ll believe it when I see it.” Wheels just says to himself, You’ll see it.”
Holy shit, this episode was pretty good but so fucking annoying at the same time. Wheels should have gotten his ass kicked about three times in it for being such a dick. But at least everyone finally told him that they’re tired of his shit. As for Michelle going back to her dad’s, I could have cared less. But I guess they had to resolve all that before the series ends.