Degrassi Junior High Reviewed

Degrassi Junior High Reviewed is a blog about the sometimes cheesy, a lot of times badly acted, but beloved Canadian 80's tv series. Each episode will be reviewed in order by a guy who just loves Canadian melodrama. New reviews every week, on Mondays and Thursday's.

Season 1, Episode 6, “Nobody’s Perfect”

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Pre-credit opener: We see Scott standing against his shitty car looking pissed off. He keeps looking at his watch and finally Kathleen comes out. She comes all cheerful and he says, “You’re late!” She says that she was talking to Mr Walfish about some bullshit. But just as she’s telling him, he fucking grabs her hair and tugs her all rough saying, “No one does this to me.” Yeah, what a terrible line that was. She begs for him to let go and he says, “You deserve it.” She says that she’s sorry and that he’s hurting her. Right when she says that he comes back to his old self. Just like Jekyll and Hyde right there. He says that he didn’t mean it and that he loves her. Kathleen being stupid says I love you too.

kathleen

Oh man, we come to Alex reciting some Bill Shakespeare and he’s pretty bad at it. All the dudes are laughing their asses off, but Mr Walfish says that he likes it that Alex got all into it. Then he pairs up Luke with Kathleen to act out a scene for the next class. Then he assigns Joey, but before he can pick out a partner, Caitlin for some weird reason volunteers for it.

caitlin

As class is dismissed Kathleen is hella nervous about getting a part in the school play. But Melanie reminds her that all the good parts go to the Seniors. Kathleen has high hopes though. I just noticed that she and Melanie dress like they’re in the 1950’s. What’s up with that?  Of course Kathleen didn’t make it and she’s totally distraught. Scott says that he didn’t either but says that they still have each other. He then busts out this cheap dollar store necklace and says that it’s for their one month anniversary. After he puts it on he says that it’s also to say sorry for him roughing her up. Kathleen is so pathetic she says, “I did sort of deserve it.” Ms Queen Bitch is all of a sudden all submissive to him.

kathleen scott

In the hall way Liz and Erica give each other the evil eye. Spike is telling Liz about Emma having a little boyfriend at the day care center but they’re interrupted by this tall Irish dude. He compliments her on the t shirt that they both happen to be wearing. Which is a band t shirt of The Pogues. Sensing that Spike is all awkward he decides to ask her out anyways. But Spike says that she can’t because of Emma. He says, “You can’t blame a man for trying.” Liz starts asking her if she wants to go out with him. She sounds all jealous, or suspicious. Probably both knowing her. Spike mentions that his name is Patrick and that he’s in grade 11.

patrick

Joey comes along singing his song. Caitlin starts talking to him and asks him when he wants to practice for Mr Walfish’s class. He doesn’t want to, but she insists. He says, “How about after school?” Right away she says, “I can’t.” He totally knows why and he says, “Going out with Claude right?” Once again she corrects him and says “Cleood.” He should have told her that she could shove her Cleood up her ass, but Joey is just too nice of a person. We hear Joey telling the dudes that a teacher is letting them use some editing equipment for their video.

Back with Melanie and Diane. Kathleen tells them that she didn’t make the play. She goes on to show them her stupid necklace. Just as they’re talking Scott comes around and tells her to come eat with him. Melanie says, “She always does what he says.” Diane meanwhile is looking at them with love lorn eyes. If she only knew what a piece of shit Scott really is.

melanie diane

Scott and Kathleen go to eat in some deserted part of the school because we see no one else around them. She says that she wants to go out for another play but Scott doesn’t want her to, because they would never see each other. She tells him that she loves acting. But then Scott being a typical abuser says that he doesn’t want to see her embarrass herself. He goes on to say, “I saw your audition, you’re not a very good actress.” Yup, he just has to put her down. So now he’s moved onto emotional abuse.

scott

We see Spike, and Patrick comes along and asks her out again. He says that maybe they can go hang out after school the next day. She says ok all happy. Liz being Ms Cheerful says, “What did he want this time?” Spike tells her how he asked her out again. Spike says that he seems very nice. Liz brings up something that happened to Spike during the Summer. Basically this guy asked her out because he knew that Spike has a kid. So he figured that he would get to pork her too.

Class is dismissed and Kathleen is bothering that loser Luke about practicing their scene. But Luke doesn’t want to saying he has something to do. As they’re talking, Scott is looking at them through a door. Looking like a huge creepy stalker. You can tell he’s getting more pissed off by the second. Especially how she put her hand on his shoulder. Luke agrees to meet the next day to practice. As she’s walking along, Scott ambushes her and fucking shoves her against some lockers. Demanding to know who Luke is. She tells him that they were assigned to work together. He tells her that she’s his girlfriend and that he doesn’t want her to be flirting with other guys. He man handles her again and shoves her against the other row of lockers. Scott wants her to get out of it and Kathleen tells him that he’s hurting her. As she says this both Melanie and Diane are just gawking at them while he’s choking her out. Kathleen tells them that they were just fooling around and she takes off running.

melanie kathleen scott

At her house she has this box of flowers with her and she smiles. She goes to the phone and calls him up saying, “Hi Scott, they’re beautiful.” What an idiot. I gotta say, it seems like Scott got mean once he shaved that mustache he was sporting.

The next day at school, Caitlin asks Joey if they’re still on to practice and Joey says ok. Kathleen grabs Luke and he tells her not to have a cow. He just has to get some shit from his locker. She says, “Meet me in the drama room.” She says Drama real funny. It sort of sounds sort of like, Dramma. While he’s at his locker BLT asks him if he wants to play some basketball and fucking Luke says, “Sure I’ll be right there!” And takes off. What an asshole.

Scott comes around and he tells her that she has to come over for dinner. She tells him that she has some school work to do and the motherfucker demands to know how long it’ll take. She tells him half an hour. I just noticed all the fucking bruises she has around her neck. As soon as he leaves Melanie and Diane start to confront her about all the fucked up shit they witnessed. Kathleen being a total battered woman is defending him. Saying how he has a real bad temper. Stupid Diane actually agree’s with Kathleen. Saying that Scott is just passionate. Melanie tells her, “It doesn’t give him the right to hurt her you stupid bitch.”  Kathleen says that she deserves it. Melanie is livid. At this point Kathleen is completely insane. She says, “He needs me, I can change him.” Then she mentions that he loves her. Melanie says, “If he hurts you, he doesn’t love you.” But Kathleen won’t listen. You know, I have no sympathy for her at this point.

kathleen diane melanie

Back to Joey and Caitlin, they’re laughing over how bad Joey is. it seems like he can’t even read. Caitlin then tells him that she wants to talk and you can tell that he just got his hopes up. She says how they used to be friends and that they can still be friends. Joey’s all, “Yeah.” She’s all, “That’s all I wanted to say.” She then has to keep talking and says, “It’s kind of like the old times.” Joey starts to act all pathetic. He starts to ask her what he did wrong and what happened. He even asks her if she thinks that he’s a loser. She says no and all of a sudden her clothes burst into flames like she was the Human Torch. Because she’s completely lying her ass off right there. Joey is a huge fucking loser and even he knows it. Caitlin says the old, It’s not you, it’s me routine. Joey basically says that he wants to change for her, but she says. “Joey it’s over.” And mentions how it’s no one’s fault. Joey leaves all broken hearted. So yeah, basically she just wanted to make herself feel better with this conversation and making herself blameless. Thus proving what a terrible person she really is.

caitlin hoe
joey

Kathleen meanwhile is practicing her lines in the Dramma room. But of course fucking Luke is a no show. Mr Walfish walks in and she asks him if she was really God awful in her audition. He says that she was pretty good and she asks him why she didn’t get her part. Basically he confirms what Melanie has been telling her the whole time which is that all the good parts go to the Seniors. But he reassures her that she is a good actress.

walfish

We then cut to Spike’s and Patrick’s date. Patrick is telling her all about being from Dublin. He sounds like that Irish dude that was in the 2nd season of the Real World. You know, where he just had to keep mentioning that he was from Ireland. Trust me, no one cared. Going on, Spike is being really fucking awkward, she says that she has nothing to tell him about herself. He tells her that he would like to give her a massage and she get’s this look on her face, he tells her that he was just joking. Man she is so fucking uptight. They decide to get an ice cream and Patrick insists on paying for them. Spike shouts at him and says, “No I said I’d pay for my own!” Goddamn, she’s been hanging out with Liz’s angry ass for far too long. He says, “While you’re at it, you can pay for mine too.” At this Spike laughs and finally loosens up. She knows that she’s fucking wound up tight. Patrick says that they should start over.

spike
spike date

Uh oh. We see Scott fuming next to his little car. He slams the door and decides to go inside. Punching lockers as he’s looking for her. Luke finally shows up all late. As they’re practicing Scott see’s them through the window in the class room. He walks in and interrupts them. Kathleen has an instant look of terror on her face. Scott asks him if he minds leaving and Luke is all, “peace out!” Scott shuts the door and says, “You lied to me.” Kathleen tells him that she wants to do well on the scene and that Mr Walfish told them to practice. Scott meanwhile is starting to Hulk out. He starts throwing books on the floor and says, “I’ve given you so much!” “Is this the thanks I get?” He tells her how she can’t act for shit and he starts to beat the ever loving shit out of her. He rips the necklace off and bitch slabs her. Saying, “You’re useless, you’re garbage.” Kathleen just ends up a crying heap on the floor. At her house her phone is ringing and it’s obvious that it’s Mr Wonderful. Her face and arms are all bruised up.

kathleen beat up mad scott

The next day Spike is telling Liz all about their little date. I’m surprised that Liz is supportive about it. Spike mentions how he asked her out to a movie on Friday. I guess Liz is going to baby sit Emma. She’s probably going to tell her all sorts of fucked up tales about being a militant anti abortion advocate.

spike liz

We see Scott come up to Kathleen and she looks like she’s scared for her life. Of course he says that he’s sorry about the other day. She tells him that he really fucked her up, but he says, “I know, but you lied to me.”  Then mentions how he loves her. Kathleen tells him, “If you love me, why do you hurt me?” Scott says that he can’t help it. Let’s face it, Kathleen is a pretty infuriating person. Still no excuse to kick her ass though. He tries to give her the broken necklace back and Kathleen just walks away. He says that he needs her and he won’t hurt her again. The episode ends with Kathleen looking all dramatic at him.

kathleen end

So yeah, this was another good one. I still hate Kathleen, so I didn’t fall for having any sympathy for her. But let’s see how fucked up Kathleen’s life is. Her dad is never around, her mom is a lousy drunk, she has an eating disorder and now her boyfriend beats her on a regular basis. And don’t get me started on Caitlin. She just revealed how she’s an even more shitty person. And Spike, man, could she get even more annoying? Talk about being a man hater, and it’s all thanks to Liz.

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Author: Degrassi Guy

Hi there and welcome to my little corner of the Degrassi Universe in the far side of interwebs. For all ten of you who are reading this, welcome! Degrassi Junior High/High was a show produced in Canada that showed the trials and tribulations of every day students. This show tackled everything and I mean everything. From alcoholism, depression, pedophiles, bullies, eating disorders, hitchhiking, death of parents, adoption, teen pregnancy, hiding other products to get condoms so no one will notice. To pornography, suicide, getting the smack down from your mustached boyfriend and getting the guts to get away from him. If I missed anything, trust me. Degrassi didn't. Degrassi was pretty much as real as it got. Especially back when I first started seeing it. Saved by the Bell it was not. You never saw Zack Morris smoking weed, getting Kelly Kapowski pregnant or AC Slater giving Jessie a good beating when she sassed him. So sit back and get ready to reacquaint yourself with the beginning of the Degrassi Universe. For those of you who are new, you don't know what you're in for. But that's a good thing. This is Degrassi Junior High/High seen through my eyes. Basically what I loved and hated. Some of you may disagree with what I think, but that's ok. Mostly though, after all these years later. I still love this cheesy show.

7 thoughts on “Season 1, Episode 6, “Nobody’s Perfect”

  1. I’d much prefer Kathleen get a beat down from Melanie. It seems to me that Melanie would have loads of reasons to kick the shit out of her. Scott on the other hand is a worthless cock pile that should have his dick sawed off and fed to him in tiny chunks. For fucks sake!! Anyway, Spike needs to lay off the lesbo lemonade Liz dishes out. So, her baby daddy is isn’t around, no need to treat that cute Irish lad like a tit. The whole thing with Caitlin and Joey is utterly annoying. Joey could do so much better. YES!! JOEY could do so much better. Especially since Caitlin thinks Cleood is hot shit. That fucker looks like he spends his nights staring into other peoples windows. I digress. What the hell were Wheels and Snake up to this episode? Wheels should have walked in on Scott beating the breaks off Kathleen just like he did when Lucy was about to get a rub down from that pedophile, homicidal looking teacher. Oh well, I just hope Kathleen learns a lesson on this; if you can’t beat his ass back, LEAVE!!

  2. Pingback: Season 3, Episode 10, “Never Gonna Give You Up | Degrassi The Next Generation Reviewed

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