Degrassi Junior High Reviewed

Degrassi Junior High Reviewed is a blog about the sometimes cheesy, a lot of times badly acted, but beloved Canadian 80's tv series. Each episode will be reviewed in order by a guy who just loves Canadian melodrama. New reviews every week, on Mondays and Thursday's.

Season 3, Episode 6, “He Ain’t Heavy”

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Pre-credit opener: We see Luke and Mark signing up for the basketball team. Luke being an asshole says, “This guy Norman, he won’t make it.” Tough break Norman, whoever you are. Snake, Shane and BLT also sign up. Snake is actually worried about making the team. But the fact that he’s a fucking giant pretty much guarantee’s that he’s going to make it. Then his much older brother comes up. Apparently he was the cat’s meow when he went to the school. But I don’t know if they’re talking about Borden or Degrassi. But who cares?!

snake dudes

In Mr Garcia’s room the whole class is shaking hands. Mr Garcia tells them to only shake hands with four other people. Spike and Alexa make a gang hand shake. Scary! Mr Garcia then asks who has a card with the Letter A to please stand. Turns out Snake has it. So he stands up looking all nervous for some reason. Mr Garcia then says, “You have Aids.” Everyone starts laughing and then he asks the four people who shook his aids riddled hands to stand up also. So Shane, BLT and one of the twins and Simon get up. Then apparently they also have aids and then pretty much the whole goddamn class is now infected. Fucking Snake started a pandemic in Mr Garcia’s math class. He then asks people who had a card with the letter C to please stand up. So Fat Nancy, Shane and BLT get up and he tells them that C stands for condom. BLT laughing like he’s a big shot. Funny Shane having a condom, if only Mr Garcia was around to do this exercise two seasons ago. Oh well.

class

Thank God class is dismissed. Simon being an idiot asks Michelle if they all really have Aids now and Michelle very slowly explains to him that it was only an exercise. Shane and BLT start making fun of Snake and call him a homo. Then they all start talking like gay stereotypes. Mr Garcia comes along and they change their voices back. After he leaves they revert back.

Lucy comes along and it seems like the twins and LD are now shunning her. She tries to apologize again but LD won’t have any of it. Then she brings up the fact that everyone thinks that they did the nasty. Outside the school Joey is still peddling his Zit Remedy tapes. Spike, Allison and Amy both deny him. He tries to talk to Caitlin next but she’s still hella pissed about the dance. Snake then comes by with BLT and Shane and Joey ask him if he wants to go to CRZY radio station to give them their tape. But Snake would rather play basketball. Snake points out that they’re just kids and no one in their right mind would want to listen to the Zit Remedy’s stupid song. Joey declares, “Joey Jeremiah will not be denied!” All three of them laugh at him because he’s clearly insane.

lucy twins

Yick and Arthur are talking about God knows what nonsense and I just noticed that Yick’s voice has deepened while Arthur still sounds like a little kid. Anyways, Dorthy is telling little Tessa to go ahead and ask Arthur something. She goes all nervous with this Asian girl and she asks if it’s true that he’s rich. Arthur denies it. But if he was smart he would admit to it. Maybe then he would be able to pick up a hot gold digger. But I forget that Arthur is a dipshit and wouldn’t know what to do with a woman.

Joey arrives at the radio station and he’s way too excited. He comes up to a cute looking receptionist that sounds like she’s from New Zealand. She asks him if he’s there for a job but Joey informs her that he’s there to peddle his lousy tape to the station manager. She says that he’s way busy today and he can drop it off, but Joey insists on staying. She’s like whatever.

receptionist

Snake and the dudes are then having a really sweaty intense pick up basketball game going on. Shirts and skins, so you know it’s on. I guess they’re calling Snake gay again because of some contact with Shane. Low and behold another giant arrives in this jeep. Turns out it’s Snakes horse faced brother Glen. He says he’s there for a little visit. BLT gives him a ball and he makes a basket, everyone’s way too impressed. BLT is seriously admiring his Jeep. Glen tells Snake that classes have been canceled for a few days and Snake keeps wondering why he’s really there for. Snake asking if he’s getting married but once again he’s wrong. After they leave BLT says that Snake is ugly. That’s not cool BLT!

snake bro

They finally arrive home and Glen get’s all serious with Snake all of a sudden. Glen says that the reason he came home is that he’s moving out of the dorm with a good friend. He says he cares for them very much. Snake assumes that he’s moving in with a girl but Glen says it’s a guy named Greg. Snake being really dense doesn’t get it. Glen mentions the fact that he’s gay and Snake says, “What are you living with one of those for?” Glen then drops the bombshell that he’s also gay. Snake is left in complete shock and doesn’t say a thing as Glen goes up to his mom to say hi.

snake glen

Back at the radio station Joey is still hanging out like an idiot. The receptionist tells him that he has to leave because she’s going home. He insists on coming back the next day to give the station manager his lousy tape. Gotta give it to Joey, He’s not one to give up.

The next day a very sweaty looking Glen is coming back from his morning run and Snake comes out all surly. Glen mentions that he tried to tell his parents the other night, but he kept chickening out due to Snake acting all disgusted the day before. Snake then says, “Oh right like it’s my fault!” “Why couldn’t you have kept it a secret?” “Why did you have to tell me?” Glen says that he loves Snake and wanted him to know who he really was, but Snake being a dickhead leaves all pissed off. Very compassionate Snake.

snake asshole

Oh lord the tired routine of people coming up the Arthur and asking him if he’s rich is till going on. This time it’s Bart and some other dork. Arthur tells him to fuck off and once again denies the fact. Still wondering who’s telling people. Arthur is convinced that someone will want to kidnap him for ransom. But Yick says that that’s just a really fucking stupid idea.

Snake is still fuming at school getting his shit out of his locker. BLT and Shane come up and they ask him if maybe Glen can play basketball with them some time. But he very angrily tells them no. Both wondering what’s up his ass. Joey see’s Shane and BLT and tries to hide but they spot him and they ask him how it went at the radio station. They repeat the line of, “Joey Jeremiah will not be denied.” Of course he lies his ass off. Saying that they were interested and he’s going back after school for a meeting. They both think he’s full of shit. BLT saying that Joey has a voice like a bullfrog. Man BLT is full of zingers in this episode.

joey blt

In class Mr Garcia is still going through Aids 101. He fields some questions and they all go through all the usual questions that people have. He calms everyone down that in fact it’s actually pretty hard to get it. Lucy then asks him why he’s teaching the class and everyone has a good laugh out of it. He says, “Bitch, shut the fuck up before I get a hot wire hanger and beat you with it.” Thankfully class is dismissed. BLT and and Shane decide to fuck with Snake again. Calling him an aids case and a homo. Snake does the mistake of pushing BLT. BLT easily pushing him back and they get into a pushing match. Mr Garcia tells them to knock their shit out. Saving Snake from a major beating because let’s face it, Snake would have lost big time. Mr Garcia asks him what’s going on, but Snake is all bottled up about it.

snake blt

After school Dorthy comes along and tells Arthur that she bet everyone that he really was rich and she lost 20 dollars. Arthur being a push over offers to pay the 20 dollars for her as long as she promises to stop telling people that he’s rich. She says promise with her fingers crossed behind her back. I hope this stupid sub plot is over with.

arthur

Lucy yet again attempts to talk to LD but LD isn’t letting this one go. Clutch and Paul then come around in Clutch’s stupid car. Paul shouting, ” Hey Lucy!” Lucy continues to deny that they boned with LD insisting that everyone knows that they fucked each other’s brains out. Lucy get’s so pissed off that she confronts Paul and his movie screen sized forehead right then and there. Lucy asks, ” Did we have sex?” Paul tries to play dumb and says, “We had a good time.” For some reason he keeps looking at Clutch, like help me! She then says, “Did we or did we not have sex? Tell it to my face you beady eyed fuck!” All Paul can do is look back at Clutch again, not saying a word. Lucy tells LD, “See you lisping bitch!” LD feels bad and runs off after her saying she’s sorry. The twins look at Paul with disgust in their eyes and leave too. Leaving Paul holding his dick in front of the school.

paul

At the now deserted Degrassi basketball hoop at the side of the school Snake is shooting some baskets feeling all sad for himself. I don’t know why they showed us this. Joey comes back to the radio station and the receptionist tells Joey that there is no way in hell that the station manager is going to see Joey. He’s all, “But I told everybody… Man he has to hear it.” Then he starts talking about the job and he says that he loves to empty garbage’s. She’s so charmed by his desperation that she says that she’ll ask if he can have the job. Instead of leaving Joey sits back down in the waiting area.

joey

Back at the Simpson residence Glen is seen getting all of his bags and throwing it into his jeep. Clearly he’s upset. Snake comes along and they have a talk. Glen says that he told them. Then he says, “I don’t exist anymore.” “You’re the only son they’ve got now.” Which is pretty sad, because Snake is a huge fucking dork. But Snake is beside himself, he can’t believe that his parents said that. But he says that he’s soory for the way he acted, but that the whole situation is weird. Then he asks if he’s going to be gay and proud too. But Glen tells him to relax, that just because they’re brothers doesn’t mean that hes going to be like that too. Sad that Glen had to explain that to Snake’s dumbass. Snake then asks him when he’s coming back and Glen says, “When I’m welcome.” Snake looks at him and you can tell by the expression on his face that he’ll never see Glen again. And we never did! I guess Snake’s parents never forgave him. Man what assholes.

snake end

So there you have it. The gay episode. I can check off Aids and Homosexuality as one of the many topics covered by this show. Maybe throw in there a little bit of Homophobia too. Which Snake and his parents clearly have. But once again the boring antics of Arthur almost brought this whole episode down.

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Author: Degrassi Guy

Hi there and welcome to my little corner of the Degrassi Universe in the far side of interwebs. For all ten of you who are reading this, welcome! Degrassi Junior High/High was a show produced in Canada that showed the trials and tribulations of every day students. This show tackled everything and I mean everything. From alcoholism, depression, pedophiles, bullies, eating disorders, hitchhiking, death of parents, adoption, teen pregnancy, hiding other products to get condoms so no one will notice. To pornography, suicide, getting the smack down from your mustached boyfriend and getting the guts to get away from him. If I missed anything, trust me. Degrassi didn't. Degrassi was pretty much as real as it got. Especially back when I first started seeing it. Saved by the Bell it was not. You never saw Zack Morris smoking weed, getting Kelly Kapowski pregnant or AC Slater giving Jessie a good beating when she sassed him. So sit back and get ready to reacquaint yourself with the beginning of the Degrassi Universe. For those of you who are new, you don't know what you're in for. But that's a good thing. This is Degrassi Junior High/High seen through my eyes. Basically what I loved and hated. Some of you may disagree with what I think, but that's ok. Mostly though, after all these years later. I still love this cheesy show.

3 thoughts on “Season 3, Episode 6, “He Ain’t Heavy”

  1. Pingback: Season 2, Episode 14, “Careless Whisper” | Degrassi The Next Generation Reviewed

  2. I was looking up the Joey Jeremiah will not be denied and this came up lol, awesome rundown of the episode! Arthur was a killjoy of this show, and his cousin always irked the fuck out of me for some reason… But how funny is it Joey was not denied by Tessa campinelli! Which is where I thought the line was said,but thanks for clearing this up! BLT haha

    Great job!

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