Ok, this episode is probably one of my least favorite ones. It deals with Stephanie’s annoying depression and no. I’m not knocking people who have depression. Many people suffer for many reasons, too many to list here. Hers on the other hand is really annoying. All this came about because she couldn’t nail Simon. Just another case of, I didn’t get what I wanted because I’m a spoiled princess. Another reason why this episode sucks, Arthur is also featured in it. And you know how I feel about Arthur.
Pre-credit opener: We come across a huge bridge. Stephanie is looking down from above. Once again she’s dressed like someone from Somber Town and she drops something to the little wash below. We then hear an alarm go off and it seems like she was just dreaming about it. We hear her mom on the phone with Arthur and she tells him that she wants him to come over for dinner that night. As I heard that I said to myself, “Oh fuck no, Arthur!” She then gives her shit for still being in bed. Her mom tells her to get her ass to school and Stephanie says, “I wish I was dead.” I couldn’t contain my eye roll.
Arthur comes along with Stephanie as they get to the school and he asks her why his mom wants him to go for dinner. She tells him to fuck off. Arthur then reminds her about her pledge to not be such a fucking cunt anymore. But she says, “I changed my mind.” He then tells her to wait and opens up his gym back. Turns out he has this smelling mangy dog in side there. Dip shit had it all the way zipped up, so it was probably dying. Speaking of the dog, it smells like death and Arthur’s already named it, Phil. And geez. Arthur’s just 12?! Melanie is even older than him. He goes on to show Yick the stupid dog.
Steph goes into Mr Raditch’s class and spy’s Simon and Alexa being happy. She makes a face and sits down. The twins come along and ask her how a movie went with her mom. Apparently her mom is banging some guy named Jerry and she skipped the movie to be with him instead. She then goes on to say that her dad who she doesn’t get along with wants custody of her. Then I get really annoyed when she says, “My life is such a disaster.” “I might as well kill myself.” The twins tell her not to joke about something like that and she says, “Who’s joking?” Erica should have told her, “Bitch get over your junior high first world bullshit.” Raditch then begins class by saying that he has good news and bad news. The good being that it’s almost the end of their year and he won’t have to deal with their asses anymore. Everyone cheers about it. Everyone except Stephanie. She looks out the window all depressed. Like woe is me! Where was I? Oh yeah, the bad news being that they have to take their exams first.
We then cut to another shot of her looking at the bridge. She looks like complete shit. She needs to put more product in her hair so it’ll stay nice and poofy. Oh, I just realized she was day dreaming again.
In Ms Avery’s class Arthur’s stupid dog is whimpering inside of his gym back. Probably crying because it smells like sweaty balls in there. Arthur pretends to cough but Ms Avery isn’t an idiot. She opens the bag and says, “What the mother fuck?!” And then sends Arthur to the principle’s office. Mr Lawrence is then heard chewing Arthur out about the stupid dog. I guess the show couldn’t afford another actor because all we do is hear his voice. Kind of like Dr Claw from Inspector Gadget. Doris is then fucked when Mr Lawrence informs her that she has to take care of his smelly ass dog. She’s pissed.
Raditch is then going on about TS Elliot. Meanwhile Stephanie is still looking out of the window. Day dreaming about flinging herself off of the bridge. Raditch dismisses the class but tells Steph to stay behind. He talks about her attitude and how she’s lost interest. He then asks if there’s something wrong at home and she get’s all pissed off. I’m getting annoyed just writing about it because of her shitty self pity attitude.
The twins then ask Steph if she wants to come with them because they’ve met these two guys and they want to take turns banging them. But her super skank powers are at an all time low and she says, “What’s the point?” “My relationships never work.” The twins then point out how shitty she’s been dressing and wonder if she wants to kill herself. Erica correctly says that Stephanie is a big drama queen and just wants attention. She pretty much nailed it there.
I love how Arthur’s stupid dog has a piece of string for a leash. Arthur then tells Yick all about the magic of having divorced parents. They talk about some other stuff, but this whole scene bored me.
At the Kaye residence Stephanie tells her mom that she has some beautiful flowers and her mom tells her that they’re from Jerry. Steph instantly get’s pissed off and makes a snide remark. Arthur comes in with Phil and her mom takes one whiff and tells Arthur to take that mutt outside in the cold.
It’s finally dinner time and Stephanie is just picking at her food, looking all down. Her mom makes a remark about their dad and Arthur defends him. Saying that he’s doing a lot more to help himself. Shit, it sounds like Arthur’s mom did everything for the guy. Phil meanwhile is dying outside due to exposure. Steph and her mom then get into an argument about her eating more but thank God Arthur changes the subject and asks his mom why she wanted him there. She informs them that she and Jerry are going to get married. Basically her mom says that Arthur’s dad is good for nothing and Arthur deserves to live in a nice home with her telling him what to do. Kind of like Norman Bates.
The next day her mom is telling Stephanie to get her ass to school and reminds her that Jerry is coming over to meet Arthur for dinner. After her mom leaves Steph just lays back down. Probably thinking of that goddamn bridge again.
Arthur’s telling Yick all the latest news about him and his family. Yick points out that Jerry is going to become his step dad. Arthur mentions that he’s nervous to meet him. Probably because he knows he’s a lame fucking square. During this bullshit, we hear fucking Phil yapping in his bag again. Arthur for some stupid reason thinking that it wasn’t cool to leave him at his mom’s. What an idiot.
In class Mr Raditch is very dreamly reciting some poetry. Since this episode has pretty much been boring, he’s putting me to sleep. Probably the people reading this too. The twins gossip about Steph and the camera basically just hangs on her empty chair. While this is going on. Stephanie is wondering around the mean streets of Degrassi. Once again dressed like an extra from a Tim Burton movie. I don’t know what’s this fascination with this bridge. We all know she isn’t going to do shit. So just stop it already director!
Turns out Arthur put Phil down in the boiler room and he’s gone. Some hobo probably had him for some Phil stew. But no, Louella comes in with Phil and she sends the both of them to see Mr Lawrence. Then she adds, “Get that dog off the school.” Mr Lawrence telling him the same. Stupid Arthur got a week’s detention and get’s sent home. Yick says, “Big fucking deal yo.” “I get detention all the time.” Proving that he’s still a fuck up.
HAHA! This next scene is so annoying that it literally made me laugh. Steph is on some swings, trying her hardest to look super depressed. But really. What does she have to be depressed about? So she didn’t get Simon. Who gives a shit? I can see why people hate on her whenever they watch this episode. Because I’m watching it right now and it’s driving me crazy. Arthur comes along and makes it worse. Arthur asks why she wasn’t in school and that she’ll get in trouble with her mom. She replies with, “She doesn’t care.” “I could kill myself and she wouldn’t care.” Arthur’s like, “Bitch stop being so over dramatic.” Arthur then asks Steph if he’ll like Jerry and if he has to call him dad. She tells him to fuck off and that she has her own problems. I rolled my eyes so hard that they got stuck and I now need surgery. Fucking Stephanie Kaye and her stupid bullshit depression!
At their house mama Kaye is acting like a school girl. Laughing at Jerry’s lame jokes. She asks why Arthur is there early and he makes up a bullshit excuse that school let out early. Jerry tries to bond with Arthur by suggesting to hose off Phil’s smelly ass. Stephanie comes in being the bundle of joy that she is. Her mom asking her to help out with dinner.
Jerry and Arthur come back in. Jerry starts going on about some dog that he had as a kid named Ruff. How original. Stephanie then acts like a shithead and says, “Who cares?” Her mom has just about had enough of her shit. Me too by the way. She’s all, “Fine I’ll kill myself.” Once again hilarious because her mom blows her off and basically says, “You’re not going to do shit, so shut it.” Arthur tries to chime in but Steph tells him to butt out. Pissing him off finally. He says that she’s not the only one being affected by their horny lonely mom marrying this douche bag. Their mom apologizes for their shitty behavior. They start arguing again and Arthur takes off with Phil. Jerry offers to go, but Steph says, “He’s my brother, I’ll find him!”
Steph then yelling for Arthur like she has no strength in voice finds him on the same swings talking to Phil. Arthur tells her to fuck off this time and she finally apologizes for being such a self absorbed bitch. Steph seems to finally perk up and offers to take care of Phil for him. She says that they’ll talk to their mom together since they’re supposed to be related. They both smile while playing on the swings. Wow, so this depression seemed like it was wrapped up in the last three minutes of the show. Unbelievable.
Over all, this episode sucked a bunch of donkey dicks. And it’s a real shame because Stephanie is usually an awesome and interesting character. But Arthur and his juvenile bullshit with the stupid dog just ruined everything. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. If you see an episode with Arthur featured in it, you’re going to have a bad time. This is definitely the low light of this season thus far.