Pre-credit opener: We see Benjamin Franklin on the family pay phone again, talking to Shane’s older brother. Apparently Shane has brought shame on their household because he porked Spike and impregnated her. He mentions how his mom can’t face her bridge club. My lord, can she be an even more old boring person? Anyways Shane walks in and hears the conversion. His dad wants to ship his ass to private school, but says that Shane is stubborn, but he’s going! Seems like Shane is pretty fucked here and the episode barely started.
The next day at school Yick and Arthur are checking out all the fine Degrassi women. Arthur’s going on about Yick asking out Melanie again. But Yick is being a pussy about it. Funny thing is, they went on the one date and nothing was ever spoken of it again, but I guess Yick still has a thing for her. Meanwhile, Kathleen is talking about what a filthy immoral piece of shit Shane is for getting Spike pregnant. She says, “Hi daddy.” as he passes by. He just looks at her and walks off. He should have said, “Fuck you ball buster.” Melanie points out how shitty Kathleen is, but that bitch doesn’t care. Proving the point, Spike comes up in her mom’s car and she just has to say, “Here comes mommy.” No wonder everyone hates her guts. I know I do.
Spike’s mom is actually pretty cool about the whole Spike being pregnant thing. But then gives her shit for eating a candy bar for breakfast. She points out that it’s not healthy for the baby or herself. Spike says, “Mom, I can take care of myself.” But it’s obvious that she can’t or else she wouldn’t be in this situation.
Yick acting like a stalker asks Melanie out to a movie. She smiles with a mouth full of metal and says sure. Yick suggests seeing, “Revenge of the Reptiles” but Melanie doesn’t want to watch such a stupid sounding movie. She wants to go see “Crying in the Wind” and Yick immediately agrees because he’s so desperate. Kathleen in a real shitty way says that Melanie has a date again and Melanie says, “It’s just Yick and it’s not a date.” She continues with, “Yick is just a boy and I’m ready for a man.” She says this as Joey and his crew pass by. She looks at Snake with lust in her eyes. She tells Kathleen, “And that’s a man.” But she’s sadly mistaken. Snake is not a man. He just happens to be 6’4″ and be 14.
Joey of course can’t help being a dick head, makes fun of Snake for liking Melanie, even pointing out the mouth full of metal she has. Snake says that he likes her and they rip into him some more. Joey then runs into Liz and tries to say hi, but she just ignores him. Snake makes a joke and Joey get’s all butt hurt.
Shane comes up to Spike and lets her know how his dad wants all of them to meet for dinner. Spike keeps making excuses cause she doesn’t want to deal with it. Shane insists and she acts like a complete bitch with him and just walks off. Hey! I just noticed the drawing of Billy Idol that Spike has in her locker. He’s even Billy Idoling.
Yick comes in Ms Avery’s room and tells Arthur how he made a big date. Arthur get’s disgusted with him because they’re going to go see Crying in the Wind, saying, “That’s a love story.” Please, if it was Arthur he would have agreed to anything too. Yick says that he doesn’t give a shit about the stupid movie, as long as he’s with Melanie. She then passes by and Yick looks at her with love lorn eyes.
In class Joey is making doodles instead of taking notes. It seems like it says, Raditch is a Boce, I can’t really tell. But him not paying attention in class is something that’s going to bite him on the ass by the end of the season. Class is then dismissed and Joey asks the dudes if they wanna go play video games. Wheels says he can’t because of his tutoring and Snake doesn’t want to either because he wants to ask out Melanie. Joey acts like his usual asshole self and Snake tells him to fuck off.
Liz is then seen talking to Spike telling her to miss one of her pregnancy counseling sessions, but Spike says that it’s good for her. Shane yet again reminds her of speaking to her mom about the dinner and once again, Spike acts like a complete bitch. What’s her problem? Anyways, you can tell Shane got pissed off about it this time, and who can blame him.
Now Snake seems to be stalking Melanie. She sure has her ways with the guys. Anyways, he very awkwardly asks out Melanie to go see Revenge of the Reptiles on the same night that Yick asked her out. She thinks about it for about a second before she agrees to go out with Snake. After she leaves Snake breathes a massive sigh of relief. I don’t know why he was so nervous. Melanie is so goofy and there’s no way she would have said no.
She tells Kathleen about going out with Snake and Kathleen points out how she made the date with Yick already, but Melanie doesn’t give a shit. She calls and breaks the date with Yick, saying that her parents won’t let her go out. I gotta point out, they all just got out of school. It doesn’t make sense that Yick would have picked up the phone since he’d be on his way home too. Unless he lived next door.
Spike then goes to her mom’s hair place and starts sweeping the area. Her mom tells her that Shane’s dad called and wants to have that dinner so that they can talk. Spike says that she can’t, that she’s going out with Liz. But her mom says, “Fuck that, you’re going to the dinner.” Then Spike being an asshole blames Shane for her mom not knowing about the other invites for dinner. Apparently Spike has known for weeks and didn’t say shit.
We then cut away to Shane’s dad BF talking to Shane about going to private school because his lame brothers did and Shane says that he doesn’t want to go and he’s not like them. His dad says that he should start. His mom Thelma Harper says that it would be good for him. Shane says that he doesn’t want to go because he wants to take care of the baby when it’s born. His dad says that Shane won’t even see it because it’s going straight for adoption. Ben Franklin doesn’t seem to realize that it’s not up to him.
Apparently it’s Friday and after School. Melanie is talking to Kathleen about the possibility of macking with Snake. Yick interrupts and wishes Melanie a great weekend. Poor dweeb is obviously heartbroken that she can’t go out with him. Melanie feels bad for about 3 seconds.
Yick is still bitching to Arthur about the broken date and Arthur suggests going to the movies to get over it. Revenge of the Reptiles it is. Wheels is then seen giving Snake shit for taking Melanie to the movie. Saying it’s a guys movie. Snake points out that they’re just being jealous bitches because he has a date and they’ll be spending time in Joey’s room playing Nintendo and jerking each other off. They realize it’s true and decide to go see Revenge of the Reptile’s too. Man, that movie must have been Canada’s highest grosser that year.
Shane runs into Spike yet again, talking about their big dinner. But all Spike can do is give him a bunch of attitude. I swear she’s completely annoying in this episode. Spike is then seen having a boring heart to heart with her mom. Anyways they bullshit and then leave for the dinner with the McKay’s.
Snake and Melanie’s very awkward date begins. The theater is no where near full. I guess the Degrassi production couldn’t get enough extra’s to fill it. Anyways they sit down and Wheels and Joey come in wearing sunglasses. How they could see anything is beyond me and besides, they looks like a couple of jackasses. Being dickheads they sit behind Snake and Melanie. Joey tries to scare them with his Godzilla figure.
We then cut to the restaurant and Shane’s mom is bitching about having to come there, that she could have made a dinner at home. Spike and her mom arrive looking nervous as hell. I love how he just has to wear his minister’s clothes to dinner. He probably knew they’d get nervous. He calls Spike, Spike and her mom corrects him by saying her name is Christine. Spike’s mom then orders a Bailey’s on ice and requests a separate check. Way to go Ms Nelson!
This show being unoriginal, the inevitable happens. Yick and Arthur come in to watch the stupid movie too. Melanie see’s them and just knows that she’s so boned here. I gotta point out, Arthur is the typical fat kid, he has a ton of food and candy just to watch an hour and half movie. Anyways, they sit at the same fucking row as Snake and her. Yick sees who’s with Snake and Melanie flashes her metal mouth at him. He doesn’t fall for it this time and leaves with a look of butt hurt on his face. Arthur just shrugs and continues eating.
Back at the dinner. Shane’s mom Thelma is throwing dirty looks at Spike. His dad showing how old he really is suggests sending Spike away to live somewhere else until she has the baby. You can tell this old man still thinks it’s like the 50’s when shit like that was done. Spike goes into a panic and says that she doesn’t want to go away. Spike’s mom says fuck that and completely tells that bald old fuck that that’s not going to happen. He then says that he’s glad that Shane’s agreed to go away. Shane no longer being able to stand it, goes on an impassioned speech about how his parents don’t listen to him and they only want him to go away because he’s a huge embarrassment to the both of them. He then loses them though when he says that he can take care of the baby. After he says this dumbfuckery the table is completely awkwardly silent.
Next Monday Kathleen asks Melanie about her big date. Apparently Snake is a boring person and they had nothing to talk about. Yick then walks by and Melanie tries to say hi, but Yick just gives her a Clint Eastwood squint and walks away. Arthur following suit. Melanie then tells Kathleen that she hates herself. Speaking of the 50’s, Kathleen seems like that’s where she got her wardrobe from.
Shane showing what a stalker of Spike he is is hiding behind a tree waiting to talk to her. They actually have a decent conversation because for once Spike isn’t being a cunt. Shane says sorry about the dinner and mentions how he needs to get counseling. Which is hilarious. He tells her that, “It’s not easy being the guy either.” They have an awkward silence and just stare into each other’s eyes. But I swear, It seems like Shane is looking over her head. What’s that all about?
I gotta say, there were a lot of awkward silences and a lot of stalking going on in this episode. Yick, Snake and Shane were all guilty of it.