Pre credit opener: We see Rick eating some Mr T cereal and then his dad walks in. This guy looks like a reject from the band Mr Mister. What gigantic hair he has. Anyways, he notices Rick reading a motorcycle magazine and he asks where he got the money to get it since they’re hella poor. Rick says that he sold some old dusty bottles they had in a crate and holy shit his dad goes ballistic and lays the smack down on poor Rick. Yelling, “I pity the fool who sold my bottles for 5 cents!” then he proceeds to slap the shit out of Rick. All Rick can do is yell, “no dad, no.” What a fucked up way to open up the show! You can tell this is one of the “special” episodes even though every episode seems to be like that.
Back at Degrassi Junior High we see Joey doing really shitty tricks on a skateboard and then he annihilates himself by running into the bike racks and hits his head on the ground. He bleeds and dies, the end.
No, he get’s up and Mr Raditch just happens to be there and reminds him that he’s told him before to not be a fuckhead. Then he sends him to the nurse to see his bleeding scalp. Caitlin Ryan and her token black side kick Susie notice Rick riding up in his Pee Wee Herman style bike and talk about what a bad seed he seems to be, but also about how fine he is.
Meanwhile it appears that it’s going to be picture day soon at Degrassi Junior High and Stephanie asks Voula what she should do about how she dresses because her mom can’t find out what a skeeze she is. Voula still has a bug up her ass from what Stephanie did in the first episode. Any viewer of the show would instantly say, “she’s still pissed?” “This is bullshit, get over it already bitch!”
Back at Ms Avery’s class, Caitlin and Susie are still going on about what a loser Rick appears to be. They get fixated on the fact that he never smiles. What they don’t realize is that his face is probably paralyzed due to all the beatings Rick has received throughout the years. Caitlin’s like, “let’s invade his privacy and force him to smile.”
Back at Raditch’s class all the talk is on photo day and holy shit, Tracy Morgan’s on the show! I didn’t know that. Apparently he played a kid named Tim.
Any ways Joey get’s in trouble for talking about wanting to wear his smelly old jean jacket for photo day.
We go to Joey’s house and he talks to his mom. Call me crazy but I think that she’s a milf and how an asshole like Joey can come from her loins is beyond me.
He starts complaining about why she cleaned his room for. He lost it when she threw out his night time dream rag. He acts like a little bitch when he see’s that his mom made a huge fucking hole in his jean jacket. Saying that he can’t wear a new one because he’ll look like a “broomhead” for picture day.
Then he goes crying to his room saying that it’s child abuse. Might I point out that this is the one and only time we see Joey’s dad. He must have been too busy with community theater to ever be available for the show again.
The next day he’s still going on to Tracy Morgan about what assholes his parents are for ruining his lousy jean jacket. Rick over hears and tells Joey that if he has money that he’ll sell him a used one. Saying that everything he has is used. Rick looks like he either has bruises all over his arms or the motherfucker needs to take a bath. Caitlin and Susie then ambush him and tell him the stupidest unfunniest joke ever. Rick just walks away, not even slightly amused.
Once again Stephanie tries to reach out to Voula but Voula is still over doing it about being pissed. This shit got old fast let me tell you.
After school Joey heads on over to Rick’s house. Joey says, “great place man.” He’s a liar because that place is a major dump. Rick then does the fatal mistake of offering Joey a pop or Coke. Whatever you prefer. So he gives him the jacket and it fits. Apparently it was his older brother’s and his brother must have been a little pip squeak like Joey too.
His dad comes in and loses his mind over the soda being gone. So now the bout to knock the shit out of Rick II starts off. Joey hauls ass terrified of seeing Rick getting the bejesus beat out of him.
So finally! It’s picture day. This show sure does a good job of dragging shit out. The Degrassi Junior High kids are getting their pictures taken and Jesus Christ! They barely sit down and the photographer takes their pictures. They must have gotten him out of the local Penny Saver. Stephanie Kaye comes along and really out does herself this time. She has the skankiest outfit ever. Voula looks so ridiculous sporting an outfit that not even a Romanian peasant would wear.
Then come the grade 7’s and Melanie says that she has a big puss filled zit on her forehead so she covers it up with her huge mushroom hair.
Rick takes a pic like a true gangsta and doesn’t crack a smile.
Afterwards he comes up to Joey asking for his money. He doesn’t have enough so they decide to go to Joey’s after school to get the rest. Joey tries to reach out to him about what happened with his dad slapping Rick around like a rag doll, but Rick just tells him to shut the fuck up.
Ugh. Caitlin and Susie again come up with a stupid way of trying to make Rick laugh but they just make themselves look like two of the lamest assholes ever. Even Degrassi Junior High super nerd Alex Yankou is thinking what the fuck in the background.
Tracy Morgan is bothering Joey about what happened at Ricks during class and that pisses off Mr Raditch. He goes off on Joey and sends his ass to the principle once again. After he got his weekly paddling, he comes out and talks to the secretary Doris Bell. Joey’s such an idiot he makes it sound like he’s the one being abused. Even though he deserves it for being a spoiled tactless asshole.
So after school Joey takes Rick to his house for the money and there’s a social worker there from Children’s Aid. The Canadian equivalent of CPS. I’ve heard people say that he looks like Prince Harry but with Kajagoogoo hair. He questions Joey and it becomes clear that it’s Rick that needs to be rescued.
Rick tries to get away but the chain on his ridiculous looking bike breaks. So he and Limahl bond over the bikes and he offers to take him away from his dad for being such a brute.
The next day Joey finally gives him his five bucks. Rick mentions how he’s going to live with his loser brother Frank for a while and tells Joey he can come over and maybe one day ride his brother’s Harley. Rick calls him buddy and smiles.
Caitlin declares this the Miracle at Degrassi Junior High and she can’t contain her joy. She needs to get a life.